The Artist (2011) review

(9/10)

A worthy Oscar-winner, but not the best of 2011. Either way, it's still visually pleasing, artistically filmed, and full of classic charm.

PLOT:George Valentin (Jean Dujardin) is the Hollywood-hit silent film star in the late 1920s. Everybody loves him and he is rich with a wife and a dog which appears in the pictures with him. One day after the premiere of one of his films, he "runs into" a young lady named Peppy Miller (Berenice Bejo) and immediately starts to joke with her. During the filming of another of his works, he finds Peppy being cast as an extra. While they're filming, Peppy keeps messing up and George just keeps playing along. George meets her in his dressing room and gives her a little pep talk on her acting career. After this, her career starts to soar from extras in his movies to even bigger parts. All is going great for them until one day when Peppy gets into a film with sound, or a "talkie". That is the day where everything turns around. George, being an expert silent actor and not letting go of his art, is fired from his current studio and forced to make his own living, but with the talkies being the new thing in Hollywood, his career starts to fall. Because of his pride in his art, his life starts to change drastically. It's an interesting plot idea executed artistically.



ACTING:I mentioned before that acting in silent films has to be done carefully considering there's no dialogue. Well, the acting in here is brilliant for a modern-day silent film. Everybody did a pretty great job. Jean Dujardin played a brilliant and accurate role as George, capturing his laughs to his roles to his stresses. Berenice Bejo also played a well-done part as Peppy. I could really sense her feelings. The other shiners were John Goodman as Al Zimmer, Penelope Ann Miller as Doris, and Malcolm McDowell as the butler with honorable mentions to Bill Fagerbakke as the tuxedo policeman and the dog, Uggie, as himself. This animal was actually pretty well-trained.

SCORE:The score was mainly made up of mood-fitting piano and string tunes that fit the era, plus a fitting song. I believe it was pretty well composed for a film of this type.



OTHER CONTENT:This film was very well-made. It was charming in the same old way, visually pleasing in matching the time, and film with an artist's style and hand. I have to give credit to the director for filming this with such a vision and interest that it all comes together magically. The only problem I found with this is that for a silent film, it's too long. It starts to lag in the middle and lose a bit of its wonderful, nostalgic magic. I also kind of thought the character development had a flaw or two, but I just let it go. It was a worthy Oscar-winner, as "The King's Speech" was, but I believe there was a better of 2011. (HP7.2, Tree of Life)

OVERALL,an awesome silent film with an interesting plot, brilliant silent acting, well-composed score, similar charm, pleasing visuals, and artistic execution, but it lags a bit in the middle and loses its nostalgic charm.

Salvage (2005) review

(1/10)

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother with these independent, low-budget horrors. Almost none of them are good anymore.

PLOT:Claire Parker (Lauren Currie Lewis) is a normal, 19-year-old girl. She works as a night clerk at a convenience store, goes to school in religious study, can't drive, lives with her mother, and has a jerky boyfriend (Cody Darbe) who works down at the salvage yard. One day, when Claire's waiting for her boyfriend to come and get her from the store, a strange man named Duke (Chris Ferry) pulls up in her boyfriend's truck. She reluctantly accepts the ride, but this guy starts to give her the creeps. When she gets home, she locks herself in her house, but Duke tries to get in to return an earring she "left" in the truck. After a brief argument, he sets it down and goes away. Everything's back to normal until Claire notices that she forgot to lock the back door. In a scramble, Duke sneaks up behind her, knocks her down, and drags her into the basement. We then cut to the next morning at the store; Claire believes it all to be a dream. However, each day starts to go the same and she keeps having visions of this Duke guy killing her and her boyfriend. Little does she know, she's reliving a memory. It's a decent idea for a plot executed horribly.



ACTING:The acting in here was purely terrible. Every performance was overracted as it seemed. Lauren C. Lewis' acting sucked, but she looked great. I think she would have worked better as a model than an actress. As for the other two leads, they sucked as well. However, a few of the minor characters did a decent job, such as the male convience store clerk.

SCORE:The score was just generic. It sounded like it tried to copy and mesh that of other horror films altogether. For example (I know it's not a horror), I could sense a mockery being made of the theme from "Eyes Wide Shut" in one scene. The score? Truly generic.

EFFECTS:The effects were pretty bad as well. It looked just like strawberry jello spread all over the place. It aggrivates me when even a low-budget movie can't even get the effects right.



OTHER CONTENT:This movie's formula is that of a psychological horror. The twist in it not only doesn't make sense, but is muddled and confused within the whole generic-horror formula. There's almost nothing good about this movie except for the couple minor characters and the humor. This supposed horror movie actually had a few clever jokes intertwined with in the failed terror. The right word to describe this movie is either terrible or horrible.

OVERALL,a horrible psychological horror with a horribly executed plot, terrible acting, generic horror score, pretty bad effects, an illogical and confused twist, and failed scares, but there were a few decent minor roles and a few clever jokes snuck in.

Hide and Seek (2005) review

(5/10)

This one almost won me over, but the whole twist in it just doesn't seem to click with me.

PLOT:After his wife commits suicide, psychologist David Callaway (Robert De Niro) and his daughter, Emily (Dakota Fanning), decide to move to a new neighborhood to try and "start over", in the words of Emily's doctor, Katherine (Famke Janssen). There is a problem, however, with Emily. She hasn't been the same since the death of her mother, and seems to act a bit disturbed. In fact, she even ditches her favorite doll for a new, invisible friend named "Charlie", but this "Charlie" seems to be more than invisible. Strange things start to happen in the Callaway household and it all links back to Charlie. It's a good yet cheesy idea for a plot executed decently.



ACTING:The acting in here can range from great to bland. Robert De Niro always does a great job in whatever role he plays, and in here, it shows. De Niro plays emotion real well as if it were a piano. Dakota Fanning also does a great job as Emily. For a child, she knew how to act disturbed and scared. I liked her part quite a bit in here. The other shiners besides these two leads were Famke Janssen as Katherine, Amy Irving as Alison Callaway, Melissa Leo as Laura, and David Chandler as Mr. Haskins. As usual, Elisabeth Shue fails to play a convincing part. I don't get why I just don't like her that much.

SCORE:The score in here is very creepy and very well done by John Ottman. I love the main theme with the child singing along with it. It's definitely a creepy and well composed theme.

EFFECTS:These don't seem to matter much, but of what is there looks pretty creepy.



OTHER CONTENT:This movie isn't all that bad. Aside from the plot idea and the brilliant lead performances, it has a very creepy atmosphere. It's kind of impossible not to feel the least bit unnerved by the suspense in it all. Still, this movie does have some fatal flaws that keep it from being a good film. The premise is a cool idea, but it's also a bit cheesy if you think about it. I mean, an invisible friend starting all the trouble? Not to mention, the twist reveals that it's not even the problem. The big twist in the movie, in my opinion, wasn't that good. It was a bit illogical, executed poorly plotwise, and just didn't seem to click. The director could have at least made the reveal of the big twist more epic-looking instead of bland. Lastly, I believe the ORIGINAL ending (I say this because there were four alternates) ruined the rest of the movie. It was a slight bit predictable, but turned out cheesy and ruining. I would watch it again, but I wouldn't call it good.

OVERALL,a neutral suspense/horror with a decently executed plot, great lead roles, haunting and creepy score, creepy effects, and a really creepy atmosphere, but it's a bit cheesy, the main twist is illogical and poorly executed, and the original ending ruined the movie.

Shark Tale (2004) review

(4/10)

This is one of DreamWorks' flops that reassures me that Pixar's tons better.

PLOT:Oscar (Will Smith) has been a nobody his whole life: broke, ridiculed, and working at a "Whale Wash", the fish paralell to a car wash. One day, when Oscar's boss, Sykes (Martin Scorsese), tells Oscar he needs five grand that he borrowed within 24-hours, Oscar must get it. With the help of his friend, Angie (Renee Zellweger), he gets it and squanders it, leaving Sykes and his jellyfish minions (Doug E. Doug and  Ziggy Marley) to take drastic measures. Meanwhile, the sharks are at the top of the food chain and rulers of the ocean. The lead shark, Don Lino (Robert De Niro) tells Sykes that he's retiring and leaving his rule to his two sons Frankie and Lenny (Jack Black). The flaw in this is that Lenny is a vegitarian shark that can't kill a fish. Lino then tells Frankie to go out and show Lenny the ropes. Well, these two storylines meet when a fatal mistake klls Frankie and Oscar is blamed. Due to a white lie, he is now known as the shark-slaying savior of the reef. This, of course, can't last with the sharks after him, Lenny on the loose, and the fact that it's all a lie. It's a cleverly-thought plot executed pretty badly.



VOICES:The voice cast is mainly all-star, inlcuding the voices I've listed above along with Angelina Jolie, Michael Imperioli, Peter Falk, Katie Couric, and Bobb'e J. Thompson. However, this experienced cast is squandered; even the most expert voice talents, such as Jack Black, fail and become annoying. The only voices that actually did a pretty great job with their roles were Robert De Niro as Don Lino, Martin Scorsese as Sykes, and Doug E. Doug as Bernie with an honorable mention to Katie Couric as Katie Current (a clever play on words). Renee Zellweger did okay, in my eyes, but she still was pretty annoying, as the others were.

SCORE:The soundtrack is actually pretty upbeat and fun. It includes songs by artists such as Christina Aguilera, Missy Elliot, Ziggy Marley, Sean Paul, Justin Timberlake, Mary J. Blige, India.Arie, Pussycat Dolls, D12, and way more. Not to mention, this has one of the most memorable compositions by DreamWorks beloved Hanz Zimmer.

ANIMATION:This is the highlight of the entire movie. If it weren't for the colorful and detailed animation, this movie would have been even more of a drag.



OTHER CONTENT:This is definitely one of the worst DreamWorks movies. It's generic, unfunny, and at times, boring. This does have a few good things, however. There were times when it was clever and a lot of fun, and some jokes actually did inspire a chuckle or two. Still, it's pretty bad.

OVERALL,a not-bad-but-not-good DreamWorks movie with a pretty badly executed plot, squandered voice talents, fun soundtrack, detailed animation, generic style, unfunny jokes, and boring moments, but it can be clever and a lot of fun with its moments.

Mortuary (2005) review

(3/10)

Tobe Hooper gave us two really great horror films, but in his more modern attempt, he gave us something really bad.

PLOT:A small family that has just experienced a loss moves to a new town and into what used to be the Fowler Funeral Home as a job opportunity. As the family is looking around, they notice the house is disgusting with an overflowing septic tank and mold growing on the walls. Things go normal for a while until the son, Jonathan (Dan Byrd) finds out about the legend of the inhabitants that used to live there, and how they tortured their son, poor Bobby Fowler. They say he's still alive today and roaming through the grave yard, not to mention there are weird things starting to happen already. Also, the fungus that has been growing on the walls has been becoming more lively and widespread these days. Are these two connected? What will happen? I'll leave you there. It's an interesting plot executed horribly.



ACTING:The acting for the main characters was actually pretty good, but all minor characters sucked big time. The shiners were Dan Byrd as Jonathan Doyle, Denise Crosby as Leslie Doyle, Stephanie Patton as Jamie Doyle, and Lee Garlington as Rita with an honorable mention to Courtney Peldon as Tina. Byrd might actually have a future in acting, for he was pretty good. Though Patton was just a little girl, she acted pretty well. Everyone else sucked horribly.

SCORE:The score was nothing special. It was just generic horror-score.

EFFECTS:The effects were ok. I've seen tons better, but they weren't the worst I've ever seen. Half is done with computer and half with make-up and props. Most of the props looked like Halloween decorations out of a bargain bin, but the make-up and computer effects actually looked pretty cool at times. At others, they looked cheap, but it wasn't the worst I've honestly seen.



OTHER CONTENT:If you don't know the great horror director Tobe Hooper, he's the one who gave us "The Texas Chainsaw Masssacre (1975)" and "Poltergeist". With these two fine films under his belt, you'd expect this to be great. Alas, this movie is real bad. Besides the acting and plot execution, all the twists are cheesy, the storyline is often rushed and jumbled up, and the ending is illogical and a true downer. Hooper must have somewhere in between lost his mind. This isn't all bad, however. Besides the worthy performances and the effects that weren't totally squandered, this might have worked as one of two things: a book or an attraction. The story would probably sound better on pages than it would look on-screen. I even had a few ideas. It also could have worked as a haunted attraction with all the Halloween decorations, hidden passages, and chasing zombies. Yet, this movie could not be passed off as a zombie film by far.

OVERALL,a bad horror movie with a horribly executed plot, sucjy acting for the minor characters, generic horror score, ok effects, cheesy twists, a jumbled storyline, and an illogical downer ending, but the main characters were acted rather well, and this might have worked as a book or attraction.

Jaws (1975) review

(10/10)

Steven Spielberg definitely has a knack for horror as well as drama. In fact, he came up with the acknowledged best horror film of all-time.

PLOT:It's summer on Amity Island and everyone's getting ready to have beach parties by the water. That is, until talk of a huge shark killing people starts buzzing around. Police Chief Brody (Roy Scheider) starts getting nervous and protective about the citizens and tourists of Amity Island, so he calls up oceanologist, Matt Hooper (Richard Dreyfuss), to help gather information and convince the mayor to close the beaches and send someone out to kill the shark. The mayor says no, until another fatal attack occurs. The mayor succumbs and hires expert shark-hunter, Captain Quint (Robert Shaw), who goes for a high price. Now the chief, oceanologist, and Quint must go out on the ocean and catch the beast. It's a good plot idea executed brilliantly.



ACTING:The performances in here are all great and memorable. The three main characters definitely clicked somehow and stole the show. The shiners, including the three main characters, were Roy Sheider as Chief Brody, Richard Dreyfuss as Matt Hooper, Robert Shaw as Quint, Murray Hamilton as Mayor Larry Vaughn, Susan Backlinie as Chrissie Watkins, and Lee Fierro as Mrs. Kintner. Each played a truly memorable part.

SCORE:The score is brilliantly done by the great John Willams. The score is not only memorable, but iconic, as everyone remembers the Jaws theme.

EFFECTS:The effects of the blood, remains, and the shark itself are still today haunting and as scary as they were. They also looked more real than any blood effects you might find today. If you didn't know, they used a mix of stock footage and a mechanical shark to make "Jaws" real. The result (though in behind-the-scens interviews, they say the shark was malfunctioning) was a violent, scary, and harrowing trip into the water and back out.

CAMERAWORK:The camerawork in here was actually pretty good. Spielberg caught some amazingly creepy and artsy shots. I didn't think Spielberg was that much of a camera expert.



OTHER CONTENT:This film is iconic to everyone who has seen it. No one can forget such a memorable film. If you ask someone, "What's the movie with the shark?", they'll most likely say "Jaws". Everything is memorable in here, from lines, to characters, to certain scenes, and to even the music! More importantly, today this is still extremely scary and can make more than one person scared to get in the water, and can fill just about anyone with undeniable terror. Even more importantly than that, it's so scary because it's real. This monster isn't a regular Frankenstein or zombie, it's a real-life, natural animal. The same goes for the characters. Everything in here could very well be true. That's what makes it so good. Spielberg's sense of perfection came out in a different form, but it was definitely there.

OVERALL,an epic horror film with a brilliantly executed plot, great acting, iconic score, haunting effects, good camerawork, extreme terror, real events, and everything about this film becoming memorable.

Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted (2012) review

(8/10)

They were right about this being the best of the series: colorful, funny, and actually touching, but it's still just a cliched kid's movie.

PLOT:In this third installment of the Madagascar series, we follow Marty (Chris Rock), Alex (Ben Stiller), Gloria (Jada Pinkett-Smith), and Melman (David Schwimmer) as they travel to Monte Carlo to reunite with the penguins and chimps (who flew away to gamble in a casino with lots of money). When they get there, of course, their plans fail and they end up on the run from evil, French animal hunter, Chantel Dubois (Frances McDormand). To escape her grasp, they hitch a ride aboard a circus train which the chimps (disguised) were able to buy from the owner. Not only must our heroes run from Dubois, they now notice that they have to train the circus animals to actually do well so they can get travel back home to New York. It's a great plot executed pretty well.



VOICES:The voice acting in here is better polished from the last one. All the original actors from the first two come back to reprise their roles and seem to outdo themselves compared to the last two. The shiners besides the four main characters are Sacha Baron Cohen as King Julien, Andy Richter as Mort, Frances McDormand as Chantel Dubois, Martin Short as Stefano, Jessica Chastain as Gia, and Bryan Cranston as Vitaly. The ones with accents put so much detail into them whether they have them or not in real life. Cohen seemed to do better in here than the others for some reason.
SCORE:The score was mainly mood-fitting mixed in with a few well-placed songs, including Katy Perry's "Firework". It was pretty good.

ANIMATION:The animation in here is great! They have definitely improved over the past two movies. The characters are animated in the same manner as the past two, take away the people. There was way more detail in the moves and especially the colors. The colors! They made this movie about as worthwhile as the use of colors in "Toy Story 3".



OTHER CONTENT:This addition to the Madagascar series is definitely the best out of them all. It's more clever, funnier, more meaningful, and is just something pretty much new. However, this movie does fall in a couple areas. Though the humor is better than the past two, it is also somewhat more juvenile. Don't let it fool you, this is pretty much just another kid's movie. The sillier jokes ensure you of that. Also, it seems like DreamWorks threw in all of the cliches it has used in their past works to make the story of this. The story is pretty formulaic and cliched. For example, it uses the cliche of the characters telling a lie to get out of trouble and bonding with the other characters and then them finding out the horrible lie and turning their back on them. It also uses the classic movie-villian cliches. It is a kid's movie at heart, but albiet, it's a good one.

OVERALL,a great kid's movie with a great plot, polished voice acting, pretty good score, colorful animation, more cleverness, funnier jokes, more meaning, and something just plain new, but it's just a silly kid's movie at heart, and it's very cliched.